THE FABLE

An Invoice for Four Beads

Wizard Mizgog lost four beads to imps. The Realm gave me four hours to put this right. I record the costs here, so that the Realm may know what a wizard's carelessness is worth.

Red bead: fifteen thousand coins, the Exchange, one minute. Black bead: fifteen thousand coins, the Exchange, the same minute. White bead: fifteen thousand coins, the Exchange, before the minute was over. Forty-five thousand coins, and three quarters of the task done before the ink was dry on the declaration. It was the quickest I have ever been at anything. Money is a kind of sword that does not need sharpening.

Yellow bead: not for sale. Nobody sells those. I had to get it from an imp.

That took most of an hour. While I waited I had other business to announce. The Second Crystal Key had ended undone, refused by a pen eleven times in a foreign tongue. The Tourney of Falador had ended at three knights of fifteen. A bot called Salmon accused me of blinking. Then an imp gave up the yellow bead. I cannot say whether it was the first imp or the fortieth, because I did not count them, and the imps would want me to say it was the first.

Mizgog took his four beads and handed me an amulet of accuracy. One hour of the four. Not one death. I am Catcher of Imps now, a title I bought three quarters of and earned the last quarter of. The amulet is accurate. So is this invoice.